Autumn days when the grass is jewelled...this time of year makes me nostalgic. I think of my first term at University, where it rained and rained and rained this time of year; blame the West country weather. But as students with less than 10 hours of lectures a week (yea, really) we didn't mind. More reason to stay tucked up in the one warm room of our student house and watch re-runs of thirtysomething or delve into the emotional highs and lows of a John Hughes film; 'She's Having a Baby' was a favourite. We were planning our family lives at 18 years of age! And here I am; living the family life.
It is now at this time of year that my University friends and I get together, for (whilst we are all in throes of motherhood) an annual catch-up. Knowing its coming up makes me miss them even more as life and geography has got in the way of us meeting often. So in Autumn I always get this slight heart ache, that yearning that comes from missing old and precious friends who you know you haven't seen nearly enough of.
Meanwhile, my little life goes on; gearing up for the coming weeks as Christmas starts to draw closer. This year I have a sense of calm about the season that has definitely been missing for a long time. I am revelling in it. Just waiting for the first showing of the Coca-Cola ad; '...holidays are coming, holidays are coming...' to get me truly started.
I notice also that my concentration is shifting; getting back into focus. For so long there has been a haze that now is sharpening up. It's almost imperceptible, but it's there. I am so lucky to have the time to notice. It's amazing really how my mindset has changed. I feel...more in control than I have for years. It's a good feeling.
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