So it is almost upon us; what seems to have been brewing for AGES, my two children start their new schools this week. I know this fact has peppered so many blog posts for so long, I am tired of writing it. I want it be to something we have done and looked back on and found: it's all been fabulous.
A long road to get here though - Boo sitting tests and interviews to get to her chosen school and my son enduring a long and rather drawn-out wrench from a school he loved, to move. Explaining the virtues of academic 'tactics' to a seven year old is tough; it was a decision we made a while back and it has taken so long to bed in. Even now I am waking at 4am wondering if we have done the right thing. You see for both of them, this will be a step up. They have come from a very nurturing place and are moving to somewhere bigger, brighter, more challenging. I have given oodles of thought to whether making things tougher for them is right. But I have concluded; that is what life is all about. I imagine it's going to be tougher for them, actually what I know deep down (in the light of day at 9am and not at 4am) is that they are ready. It's a natural progression. It's their time.
So this week is a gradual (but will feel like sudden) return to early mornings and punishing school runs; I feel like I will be starting these new schools. There is some currency I have found, in being an experienced school mother. For both establishments I will be neither; I will be the newbie who doesn't know where to put herself at pick-up and who will observe the delicate but fascinating interplay of the other mums. School Mums close-up.
For Boo - it feels like she is setting sail and despite the fact that I know she is ready - well and truly - it's tugging the umbilical, more than I can say. I have watched her grow these recent months and have caught glimpses of the young woman she is going to be. Makes my heart ache with pride. To some degree I feel like much of my job is now done; my role has fundamentally changed to being an advisor and (hopefully) a confidante rather than a director of her life. It's so very poignant but so very satisfying...fingers crossed!